I have read two blogs this morning both about relationships. The first one was about growth in a relationship and communication. The second was about being in love and letting that love go. Both were in context of a D’s relationship. These blogs of course made for powerful thought and ideas.
I am having one of those days. The days where you just don’t feel very submissive, in all honesty I did not wake up feeling that way. It was triggered by DH and his cranky mood. He woke up uncomfortable and had to leave our truck early altering our routine. I admit it was nice to make coffee and have the control of the truck and the dogs to myself.
I told him he was channeling a grumpy old man very well this morning. He did not like my observation. He has though changed his demeanor some what and is in a better mood now. He also informed me that the dogs are getting a special treat later. This code means I will be put through the submissive paces tonight or later this afternoon.
I really expected to feel unexcited or disinterested about this proclamation. I expected to feel and think, “I am not wanting to be submissive”, but guess what I am excited and interested. My own mood changed immediately with his proclamation. I have switched back to being submissive to him immediately.
This is growth in our relationship. He switched off the grouchy old man and turned on the loving dominant. I turned off the rebellious bitch and became the loving submissive. It took just a moment. Are we suddenly listening to each other better? Did the past month of my rebellion lead to better communication between us? Did the journey, that almost tore us apart, actually make us stronger?
I believe that it did. Somewhere in the journey of not communicating at all to communicating exactly how we felt growth happened. I hated that month it was emotionally painful and terrifying. I am glad it is over, but I am so thankful for the lesson we both received from it.